Identity Beacon

Illuminating Possibilities

Identity Beacon - Illuminating Possibilities

“I wish I had loved you more.”

With all that is going on in the world, it can be hard to stay sane, remain hopeful, and indeed, remember our shared sense of humanity. My advice? Let’s all take a break from the craziness and focus on what really matters: the people in our lives who mean the most to us. For a moment, forget the politicians, the pipe bombers and the shooters, at least for now.

The other day, I came across an article in The New York Times that stopped me in my tracks. The title is Writing a Last Letter When You Are Healthy. The author is VJ Periyakoil a geriatrics and palliative care doctor. Dr. Periyakoil describes his experience with end-of-life patients who express regret about not telling the people who mattered most to them how they really felt; among them: parents, sons, daughters, friends, and teachers.

My father died unexpectedly when I was 25. I had no time to tell him anything, let alone write a letter expressing my feelings. Neither did he. That experience has made me appreciate Dr. Periyakoil’s work on a deeply personal level. When I think about that moment, the difficulties that color our world today recede in my mind. I am left feeling clear-eyed about what matters most.

As if the first article weren’t enough to bring you back to what truly counts, here’s another one that grabbed my attention recently. It is entitled Stubborn Grudges Yield Little. Time to Change Your Investing. No, not necessarily your financial investing; your emotional investing.

Written by Carl Richards, a certified financial planner and regular contributor to The New York Times, the piece talks about how holding a grudge can slowly eat away at your soul, draining you of your humanity in small incremental amounts.

In the end, writing “last letters” is about more than affirming love, making amends, or offering, or asking for forgiveness. It is about freedom. The freedom to let go of what haunts you, to release yourself from unspoken burdens of the heart, from regret. It is about finding the personal integrity we all need to feel, well…fully human.

Politicians, bombers, and shooters will be with us no matter what you do, or don’t do. The people who matter most may or may not be.

Write that letter.

Post By Larry Ackerman (69 Posts)

I’m the author of two groundbreaking books on identity. The first is Identity Is Destiny: Leadership and the Roots of Value Creation. It’s for leaders – and those aspiring to lead – who want new and innovative insights into what accounts for success over the long term. The other book is The Identity Code: The 8 Essential Questions for Finding Your Purpose and Place in the World. This work is for individuals who want to live more fulfilling, meaningful, productive lives. Bottom line: I help companies and individuals realize that they’ll be much more successful being themselves than acting like somebody else. In short, I help my clients find their true identity. When you find it, you have no competition. NOBODY can beat you at being you – especially if you consistently reinterpret your identity in ways that keep you fresh and relevant to the world around you.

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